


To Remember You

by prompto



Category: Persona 4
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-10
Updated: 2013-02-10
Packaged: 2017-11-28 20:58:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/678825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prompto/pseuds/prompto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An accident leads to a chain of events that result in a relationship having to be rekindled once again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Remember You

It had been a long day for Yu.

He had been working on sorting out last minute preparations all morning. In less than a month he was going to be moving further downtown and closer to a college campus. Although all of it so far had been almost exhausting, he couldn’t get the simple fact that he was going to be living with Yosuke out of his mind, and that made it all worth it.

For the past two years, they had been going back and forth with a long distance  _friendship_  at first, which had turned into a  ** _relationship_**  almost a year ago. Yu had known his true feelings almost before he had initially returned home from Inaba, but Yosuke was a little more stubborn in his self-realizations. So whenever Yu had last returned to his uncle’s for a visit in December, it all unfolded.

There had been a slight confrontation with a girl at a Christmas party trying to make moves on Yu. The whole time Yosuke had been watching, and just when she was getting handsy, Yosuke walked over, practically grabbing onto his best friend’s arm and dragging him outside.

He could remember it so clearly even now. The way he was flushed in anger and almost pouting, he was trying to get his words out but they were all jumbled and ended up being sounds of frustration.

Eventually Yu just leaned in and kissed him, not even asking or saying anything. And Yosuke had responded to the kiss, his arms unfolding as he had begun to grip onto him, his shirt, sides, anything just to get him closer. Yu had set his drink down and ended up encircling his arms around him, moving his hands along his back and pressing their bodies together completely.

Yu slid his key into the door of the apartment as he entered to see that neither of his parents had returned home yet. Of course it was normally like this. As he flipped on the lights, he shed his coat, hanging it on the rack nearby before slipping off his shoes and heading down the hallway to his room.

He headed for the bathroom, needing to wash off from the day of nothing but errands. It had been enough to give him a work out, and that was fine since he was trying to stay in shape. Running around the dungeons wasn’t an option anymore, so he had to stick to more realistic methods.

The shower was warm on his skin, almost making him forget that he had to be online for a cam call soon. Switching off the water, he grabbed his towel, drying off his body and then his hair as he headed back into his room to put his usual nightwear on.

After he slid on his sweatpants and t-shirt, he started to finish towel-drying his hair more thoroughly. Just as he turned to his computer, his cell phone that had been lying on his computer desk began to vibrate and ring.

Seeing it was Chie, he answered it just as he switched on his computer.

“Hello?”

“Oh hey Yu.”

“Hey, how are you?”

“I’m okay, um, listen, I didn’t really call to talk.”

“Oh? What is it then?” Yu grabbed his mouse at the computer started up, and he clicked on skype to let it sign him in.

“Well, there’s been an accident.”

“An accident?” The worry instantly filled Yu’s voice as his list of contacts showed up. Yosuke wasn’t signed on yet.

“Yeah, I mean it’s nothing serious, well it might be-“

“Who was it Chie.” His voice was coldly forward. He had a bad gut feeling all of the sudden, staring at the screen name of the one he was still waiting to see sign on for their cam chat.

“It was Yosuke.” Whatever emotion or attempt at keeping calm she had was completely forgotten then. Chie was almost sobbing as she tried to get her words out clearly. “H-He was walking to work and when he went to cross the street this driver just wasn’t paying attention and he hit him. I mean it wasn’t as bad as it could’ve been; he hit him at a slow enough speed that it didn’t do a lot of damage. Nothing’s broken he’s just…been out cold ever since.”

“He’s in a coma?” Yu was startled, gripping at the phone as he already was in the process of turning off his computer and grabbing his traveling bag from the closet nearby.

“They’re not sure. He’s just got a lot of scrapes and bruises if anything, and he’s not awake.”

“I’m on my way.”

“We’ll look after him until you get here.”

“Thanks Chie.”

Yu was in the middle of the worst kind of adrenaline rush. He was throwing whatever he thought he might need into his bag, then heading back to the front door ten minutes later. Slipping on his shoes, he tugged his jacket back on before exiting the apartment that he wasn’t even sure when he would return to.

Right now his priority was getting to Inaba. On the way to the train station he had managed to at least get through to his mother to tell her the situation. His parents knew about his relationship with Yosuke. He had no qualms about being open with them, seeing as, it was important for him to be able to go back and forth like this. And they probably would’ve started asking questions about it eventually anyways.

With the support of his mother, he reached the station in time to catch the last train back to Inaba. It was almost past ten in the evening. Just as he boarded the nearly deserted train car, he set his bag on the compartment overhead before taking his seat and making the phone call to his uncle. He’d need a place to stay, he just hated that he was calling under such circumstances.

His uncle was already aware of the situation; he had been there when they were making out the report for it. Dojima stated he was going to call his nephew, but Chie had been insistent that she wanted to be the one to do it.

“You can stay as long as you like, I told you before that our home is always open to you, we’re your family.”

“I know…thank you.”

“Do you want me to meet you at the station?”

“No, I can manage on my own. I’m sure you have a lot of work to do.”

“It’s a little hectic yeah.” Dojima paused for a few moments. “Don’t worry too much. I’m sure he’ll wake up soon.”

“I hope so.”

“All right, well I need to get Nanako home since she has class tomorrow. I’ll see you at home.”

“See you soon.”

* * *

 

The entire train ride had been filled with nothing but fidgeting in anxiety. Yu was never so strung out like this, he never let things bother him to the point that he physically couldn’t sit still. But this wasn’t just anything, this was  _Yosuke_. The person who was almost like another part of him, no,  _the_  other part of himself.

When the train reached the station, he was grabbing his bag and hastily exiting out onto the platform. Once he left the station, he could feel the difference in temperature from the city and was glad he had grabbed his good coat. It was already past midnight. Heading down the street, he knew that the hospital wasn’t that far from where he was. Everything was conveniently close here, though he wished that factor was being used for a completely different situation than this one.

As he saw the hospital further ahead, he pulled out his phone to call Chie and find out what room they were in. The walk turned into a run, and soon he was running through the automatic doors and over to the front desk. Quickly signing in as a visitor, he headed to the elevator to go up to the fourth floor.

The doors opened and he almost ran out once more, barely even making it two steps down the hall to see a group of familiar faces in the sitting area. Chie ran over with an obvious tear-stained face as she caught him in a tight hug. Yukiko was close behind her, along with Rise, then Naoto. Kanji was close by with a hand put on Yu’s shoulder and Teddie was all but sobbing in his hands with wails.

“He’s still not awake yet.” Yukiko managed to get out somehow even as she was crying almost hysterically still with her face completely red and eyes wet.

“The nurse was just looking over him, but you can go in.” Chie ran her hand down his arm as the group slowly split apart to let him walk to the room nearby.

Yu almost forgot he had his bag in hand as he opened the door, entering the completely silent room. The nurse was checking a few things and was in the process of leaving as he nodded to her and then he was left alone in that silent void.

Dropping his bag on a chair next to the door, he swallowed uneasily while staring at the figure in the bed in front of him. He didn’t look terrible, just a somewhat large gash on his right cheek, a few bruises along his jaw and neck and on his arms from what he could see. Moving to the side of the bed, he let his hand reach out to take the near-lifeless one in front of him.

“Yosuke…Yosuke I’m here. Please say something, just wake up…” He laced their fingers together, his voice starting to rise and fall somewhat. “I know any minute now you’ll wake up and tell me something lame like you always do when I first see you again…”

Yu was panicked, his heart racing as he was desperately holding onto that hand, leaning over and pressing a soft kiss to the lips that were unmoving. He couldn’t even cry, that’s how great his desperation was. Keeping a steady grip on Yosuke’s hand, he scooted the chair over and sat down on it, staring at him non-stop.

He wasn’t even sure how or when it happened, but at some point he started relaying old stories as if Yosuke was awake and responding to every detail. And then along the way, Yu passed out in mid-sentence about the time that they had exchanged tacky Valentine’s Day gifts the year before.

The next morning, he was woken up by the sound of a steady beeping noise. A quick grip on his hand made him shoot up from where he had been sitting, looking up to see a pair of brown eyes staring at him.

“Y-Yo-Yosuke you’re awake? Oh thank god you’re awake!” Yu leaned over as if to hug him when he noticed the sudden reflex back from the one on the bed.

“Woah-Woah-What the hell?!”

The hand that had been in his grasp was pulled away almost as if it had been on fire. Yu looked utterly confused as he fell back in the chair and stared at Yosuke.

“Yosuke…it’s me. You don’t remember who I am?”

“Dude, I’ve never seen you before.”

“If this is a joke it isn’t funny.”

“I’m not kidding. I’ve never seen you before-ever.”

“Are you serious? You met me two years, when I transferred to Inaba, I mean-“

The nurse and doctor rushed in after that. Everything was a blur as Yu was ushered out into the hallway so that Yosuke could be examined properly. Chie arrived a good ten minutes after that upon getting the call that he was awake. The rest of the group was in tow shortly after that, but none of it helped as Yu was leaned against the wall in the hospital wing, trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

The doctor had let everyone go in one by one, as if to run a test. Yu was the last to go in, and upon receiving the same reaction, the doctor led them out into the hallway to give his proper analysis.

“He has retrograde amnesia.”

“Meaning what exactly?”

“For some reason, he has retained most of his memories; however, the impact from the crash has caused him to forget anything in relation to you.” The doctor made a gesture to Yu and no one else.

“Why only me? I mean how is that even possible? I know people can forget certain time frames, but this just seems impossible.”

“It can happen in rare cases. I would suggest just giving it some time. Try to do some activities or go to certain locations with him to see if it helps him regain those memories.”

“Is there even a chance of that working? I mean is there a chance it might not?”

“There is that chance that it will or it won’t work, but that’s the chance with most forms of amnesia. There is a  _good_  chance that he will remember though if you interact with him, usually something triggers the remembrance.”

“Well, thank you doctor.” Chie and the others began to offer their thanks and ask a few other questions. Yu had already long since signed out of the conversation. He looked back through the window of the room, seeing Yosuke looking out the window and then moving his gaze to look at the door. By then, Yu had already turned and left the area.

Any sort of attempt to call him was a vain attempt. Yu was distraught, not showing it so much outwardly as he felt it inwardly. Not even being able to head home yet, he ended up walking throughout town. Seeing so many familiar sights, all of them holding so many memories, mostly with the one person that couldn’t remember him at all.

His feet led him to the shrine. As he slowly walked up the steps, he was barely even registering how dark it was already getting. He’d walked around the rest of the afternoon, feeling a new stab of pain every time he passed the riverbank or saw Junes in the distance. Dragging up to the front of the shrine, he stared at the hanging bits of parchment, his eyes almost closing as he shifted his gaze to the ground.

Seeing a familiar streak of dark orange, he felt a gentle brush on the side of his leg. The fox that had helped him a few summers ago was sitting there staring up at him. It was in that instant that he fell to his knees, wrapping his arms around the fox’s lithe neck and finally letting out every shred of emotion that he had held back for the past 24 hours.

The tears fell, and the fox never moved away.

* * *

 

An hour or so later, his crying had died down enough for him to regain a slight sense of calm, well enough to go home and stop torturing himself by walking all over Inaba. When Yu returned home that evening, he entered into a soft scent of tea. As he moved into the kitchen, he felt Nanako instantly run up and hug him.

“Big Bro! Is Yosuke doing okay? I heard he woke up!”

“Yeah, he’s…he’s great.” Yu gave a soft smile just as she hugged on him for a few seconds longer before going back to the table.

“I’m making him a get well card!”

Dojima took a sip from his mug just as he met his nephew’s gaze.

It only took a single glance for him to see the weariness and saddened look in grey eyes.

“Have some tea.” He set his mug down before grabbing another from the cabinet nearby and pouring him a cup.

Yu silently took the mug, adding the smallest hint of sugar to it before he went to take a sip but ended up lowering the mug back to the counter instead. As his hands lingered on the counter’s surface for a few moments, he leaned down somewhat while staring at the ground.

“Is…being forgotten worse than death?”

Dojima stared at him while trying to find the right words. “When Chisato died, I was distraught.” He went silent for a few moments as if he felt that slight remembrance of pain. “I know it’s hard to have to hear something like that, but it doesn’t mean it’s permanent.”

“But what if it is…what if he never remembers who I am…ever…”

“That’s just one of the  _what ifs_  that you can’t ask yourself.”

“But…”

“You have two choices. You can either stay in this misery and let it follow you for the rest of your life, or you can do something about it. You can spend time with him; try to help him remember who you are. It might help his memories come back faster.”

Dojima laid a hand on Yu’s shoulder as he finally noticed him meet his gaze.

“I know you’re strong. You just have to believe in him too.”

“It’s not that, I do believe in him. It’s just, he doesn’t remember me…it just feels like I’m nothing, like I’m already dead in a way.”

“I know he means a lot to you, but if he really means that much to you then you can’t give up on him.”

Yu exhaled slowly, wishing that prospect was a lot easier than it sounded.

It was hard to believe in something when all the odds were against you. Sure, a few years ago they had done that, gone through with the sentiment no matter what sort of advantage or disadvantage they had. But, these were different circumstances. Things weren’t as easy as back then, not everyone had a similar situation as he did now.

Everyone was remembered but him.

Yu laid in his futon, unable to sleep at all which was no surprise.

It was hard to even look around his room because every part of it Yosuke had been in. So many memories had been made in that room alone, and now only one part of the partnership remembered any of it. Even just lying in that futon was a stabbing remembrance of that fact, and Yu had never felt so hopeless in all of his life.

For once he didn’t feel like he had any control over something, not even a single shred. All he had was the hope that if he attempted to spend time with Yosuke that he might have some sort of breakthrough, but even that wasn’t guaranteed. The only bit of solace to him was that at least Yosuke was still there. If he had to, he would just have to make him fall in love with him all over again.

That had already been difficult enough with Yosuke the first time, more so because of Yosuke’s parents.

Yosuke had been so tight-lipped and careful about what happened between them in public. No sort of a hint to even a possible relationship between them could be revealed. His parents already had so much trouble in Inaba with the other shop owners, the last thing they needed was a rumor or fact that would ‘damage their reputation’. They had been in talks to expand Junes even further throughout Japan, it was already in the works now, so Yosuke was under even more pressure to live up to his parent’s expectations.

Only the closest people that they could trust completely knew of their relationship. That included the former investigation team turned family, along with Dojima and Yu’s parents. It was easy enough to hide from the rest of the world, but the one’s closest to them and family, well, they couldn’t hide that from them. The only exception was Yosuke’s parents because well, they weren’t really close to him, and from what Yosuke had told him before, he didn’t even consider them parents with how detached they were from him.

So many thoughts in the past and present eventually grew exhausting. Draining his mind, Yu ended up staring at the ceiling, only to have his eyes slowly close and his mind shut down.

A loud sound of something vibrating and falling to the floor made grey eyes shoot open the next morning.

Yu sat up from the futon, leaning over to grab his cell phone that had fallen off of his desk nearby.

It was a text from Chie. She wanted him to come to the hospital in an hour. How long had he slept?

The time was past noon. With a sigh he stood up, deciding he would go ahead and start getting ready for the day. He had no idea what he was going to do since everything was still fucked up. It took him just under an hour for him to go through his normal routine for getting ready, heading downstairs to decide to just eat something in town later on. He really couldn’t be bothered doing much now.

“Big bro, you’re going to see Yosuke?”

“Well I’m going to the hospital.”

“Can you give this to him for me?”

The young girl handed him a pink piece of paper that had been folded into a big card. It had a big heart on the front and inside it read ‘get well soon Yosuke, me and big bro will always give you hugs to help you feel better!’

Yu swallowed uneasily and smiled, giving her a quick hug before leaving.

With the card in hand he headed back to the place that he had fled from the day beforehand.

Approaching the room, he stood outside of it for a second, not even sure he had the courage to open the door. His demeanor showed him with a blank expression, but inwardly, his heart wasn’t sure it could take much more of such a depressing realization.

When he walked inside he saw Chie standing beside of Yosuke.

They both looked at him as he entered the room. There was a brief silence before Chie walked over and touched Yu’s arm.

“Hey, you’re right on time. Yosuke’s been released.”

“Already?”

“Well yeah, the doctor said no bones were broken and the most he has are some bruises and scrapes, but those can be tended to at home. He has some medication for any other pain.”

“I see.”

Another awkward silence started.

Yosuke was standing still. He was clothed in one of his outfits that he wore a lot during the summer time. Burnt orange pants and the white t-shirt with swallows on it. That outfit was probably Yu’s favorite.

“Listen, I called you here because I have to help Yukiko out at the inn today. His parents aren’t in town now either, I’m not sure when they’re going to be back honestly.”

“I know.”

“Anyways, I was wondering if you could just watch out for him? Make sure nothing happens?”

Yu nodded. What else could he do? The only reason he truly wanted to ever come back to Inaba was because of the one person standing across the room from him. The fact that he didn’t remember him; it still didn’t make him want to see Yosuke any less.

“All right good. I’m sure if you just spend time together that he’ll come around.” Chie gave him a reassuring smile before going to Yosuke and giving him a hug.

“He’ll take good care of you. Behave you two.”

And after that she was gone. The door closed and left them in a void of silence once more.

“So uh…they tell me we were best friends.”

“Yeah, we were.”

“You must know a lot of stuff about me then. That sort of gives you an unfair advantage.”

Yosuke was nervous. He wasn’t really worried, just  _nervous_. As he wiped his palm against his side, he slowly looked up to see how grey eyes were already staring at him. They stared at each other for a few minutes before Yu cleared his throat and took a few steps closer.

“This card is from Nanako.”

The brunette wiped his hand on his side again before taking the card, opening it to see the words and being able to imagine Nanako saying it to him in person. As he looked up from the card to see grey eyes again, he felt a strange beat from his heart.

“You must be  _‘big bro’_.”

“I’m big bro to her, and I was partner to you.”

Yosuke repeated the word over and over again in his mind.  ** _Partner_**. It left a trail somehow, making him feel like the resonation in his mind was familiar in a way. He almost whispered it out loud, feeling like it did sound okay to say the word to the person in front of him.

“Partner?”

Yu nodded, hearing Yosuke say the word to himself. He had to remind himself that he wasn’t actually saying it to him. The fact that they were using past tense too made him turn and start for the door.

“We should get out of here. Do you have everything?”

“Oh yeah. I didn’t have much.” Yosuke grabbed a bag on a nearby chair that had a few personal items in it.

They trailed through the hospital wing silently, heading for the elevator in the same manner. Signing out from the hospital didn’t take long, and soon they were walking down the street and back towards town.

“Are you hungry?”

“Uh yeah, a little. I didn’t eat much this morning.” Truthfully, Yosuke had been nervous about who he was going to be spending time with today. The initial encounter was strange, but after Chie had explained some background information he calmed down enough to accept the idea.

“Wanna go to Aiyas?”

“Oh yeah I love that place.”

The words ‘ _I know you do_ ’ echoed through Yu’s mind. He forced a small smile, trying to remember to focus on the fact that at least Yosuke was there by his side and not being buried in the ground somewhere.

“You know, I finished the special once.”

“You did? How-I mean-no one that I know ever has.”

“It took a while but eventually I found a way to do it.”

And with that small reminder to himself, Yu remembered how he had overcome so many things so far. He had gotten through the roughest of patches, and a lot of them were because Yosuke had been by his side. Somehow, he’d find a way to get him back.

Less than ten minutes later, they were seated at the bar, bowls already ordered, the aroma luring them in. Gradually they started talking more, Yosuke being as talkative as he normally was did enough to shake off his own nervous awkwardness, and Yu, well he was just happy to stare at the brunette in between their forming conversations.

It was odd at times because Yu had to remember that Yosuke no longer had memories from before or just basic facts about Yu and his life. He would have to stop sometimes to reinform him about certain things. It should have given him another depressing remembrance, but instead it just gave him a chance to watch Yosuke’s expressions or reactions. That was enough to make whatever he had to say again worth it.

“There were so many times that we ended up having Aiyas delivered.”

“I remember that Chie had done it when me and Yukiko were running away from Kanji that one time.”

“I was there too.”

“Oh…right.” Yosuke blushed in embarrassment as he stirred his chopsticks in his noodles some.

“It’s okay; I know it must be weird sometimes. I couldn’t imagine having incomplete memories.”

“Yeah well, it is a little weird. It’s like I remember things from the past few years, but there are moments that aren’t as clear as they should be?”

“Well, I’m going to try and help you as much as I can.”

“Yeah, thanks.” Yosuke smiled at him as red was still tinting his cheeks.

Yu already felt better just from seeing a smile form on those lips.

* * *

 

“This is my favorite place in Inaba. But I’m guessing you already knew that right?”

Yosuke was rubbing at the back of his head in an embarrassed manner as they stood out alongside of the riverbank later that evening. They had spent the entire afternoon walking around town after they had lunch, and it was surprisingly becoming easier to just talk. Yu had been tempted to do more, like grab his hand, but this wasn’t the Yosuke that was his. That would take time, assuming that Yosuke would even become receptive to that again.

“Yeah.” Yu took a few steps closer to the embankment, looking down at the moon’s reflection in the water. “A few important things happened here.”

“Like what?”

“Well, to start with, this was where we really became best friends. You started crying and everything.”

“What-What, I wouldn’t cry.” Yosuke started blushing again, seriously what was with him and blushing around this guy?

“Well you did. I hugged you and then I walked you home after you calmed down.”

“Ugh, that sounds so girly.”

“You said, ‘ _that’s for girls dumbass_ ’. But afterward you weren’t really complaining, in fact, you were almost clinging onto me.”

“Oh god, dude stoooop!” Yosuke had to turn away to hide his embarrassment and to calm himself from the weird fluttering feeling he got in his stomach and heart.

“The other thing that happened here was then you wanted my attention on you.”

“That sounds…even worse.”

“We ended up fighting, physically fighting. But it wasn’t even really fighting; I guess we became equals even though I already considered us that to begin with.”

“God I sound so lame.”

“I found it cute.”

Yosuke practically whined. “I’m  _not_  cute.”

Yu shook his head, a smile forming on his lips as he felt calmer than he had been before.

“There was one other thing that happened here.”

The subject continuing on after a few moments of quiet made Yosuke turn and look at the other as he was staring at the sky now.

“What was it? Don’t tell me it was me embarrassing myself again?”

“No.” Yu shook his head as he closed his eyes. “I think I’ll save that one for another time.”

* * *

 

Yu was in the kitchen the next evening finishing a few final touches on the meal he had been preparing. With how surprisingly well they had started re-adjusting to one another, he had hardly been up an hour the next morning when he texted Yosuke asking if he wanted to come over that day for dinner. Yosuke had hardly waited a minute to reply back with ‘ _I’m sure you know my favorite dish_ ’.

And he did. The first time he had ever brought lunch to school and shared it with Yosuke, the brunette had been completely in love with the Ginger Pork he had made. The dish was easy enough to make, and he had even prepared a tiramisu as something different for dessert.

Just as he finished laying the plates out on the table, there was a knock on the door.

Yosuke was half-way sobbing as soon as the aroma hit his nostrils. As he slinked into the kitchen, he leaned over the counter and stared at the food on the serving plate.

Yu shook his head, unable to stop a smile as he walked over and poked the other’s cheek that had a small bandage on it.

“Ow!”

“No drooling on the food. Go ahead and sit down.”

“Whatever you say partner.”

The word slipped out before Yosuke even realized he had said it. The weird jump in his heart made him tense a little as he headed into the living room area. Surely, something as simple as saying  _partner_ shouldn’t make him feel like…well like he was feeling something he didn’t even know existed.

Yu tried not to focus on how he heard that word again. Distracting himself with taking the food to the table, he set the plates down before sitting down in his usual place.

“So uh, where’s Nanako?”

“Dojima wanted to take her out for dinner.”

“That’s nice.”

Yosuke was staring at the food, then glancing back to Yu. Although he couldn’t remember ever sitting here with Yu being across from him, he still felt like he  _had_  been sitting in that very spot, glancing back and forth between the table and someone sitting across from him. It all felt too familiar, like de-ja-vu, and he gave Yu that look that asked silently for permission.

“Just don’t make too much of a mess.”

Yu already knew one of Yosuke’s many in-private habits was how messy he could be when he ate. It seemed like every time they would go out to a restaurant and sit in a private booth or table that Yosuke would end up making a spill or two or  _five_  and it would look like six people had sat at the table when really it was only Yosuke.

Yosuke slapped his hands together and bowed his head in appreciation before using the chopsticks to start eating the large portion of pork on his plate. Yu was trying not to stare at how messy it was already getting, but he shifted his legs, spreading them out a little as he felt Yosuke’s legs already spread out underneath the table. That had been another habit of his.

Their legs touched. Yosuke stopped mid-bite, his face obviously becoming red as he could feel their legs touching. Even though he felt his inner alarms going off, he still didn’t move away an inch. Swallowing what was in his mouth, he merely glanced at the other who was looking at him, and then resumed eating his dinner.

After Yosuke had made a thorough mess on the table, Yu had managed to clean it up rather quickly (more so from experience) and brought the dessert to the table. When he first sat down, he noticed Yosuke had been lying back, running a hand over his stomach.

“Eat too much?”

“No, just enough.” Yosuke peeked up to see the dessert being placed on the table. “Just enough to leave room for dessert.”

“I figured I’d make Tiramisu since I never have before, and you always told me you wanted to try it.”

Yosuke unknowingly licked his lips while sliding around the table to get closer to the dessert, and in turn sitting next to Yu.

“It looks amazing.”

“Taste it.” Yu took a spoonful, lifting it up for the other to taste.

Yosuke leaned forward, taking the spoon into his mouth; half-letting Yu feed him in a way as he licked every small bit of the sweetness from the spoon.

“Good?”

With a small noise of approval, Yosuke nodded staring at Yu who had set the spoon back on the plate. For a moment Yu stared at him. He then lifted his hand up and brushed his fingertips over the bruise that was coloring along Yosuke’s jawline.

“Have you been putting ice on this?”

“Oh well um, I kind of just was so tired after I got home last night so I forgot.”

“Your parents still aren’t home yet?”

“No, I don’t think they will be for another week or two even.”

“Did you want to stay here? I know you don’t like staying in that big house alone.”

Yet another fact that he never told anyone was brought to Yosuke’s attention. Swallowing uneasily, he could sense how fingertips were still lingering near his jawline. “You really did know me didn’t you?”

“I could tell you so many things about you Yosuke, even some that you state you’ve never told anyone else.”

“Is that why I already feel so comfortable around you too?”

“Hmm maybe. Most people tend to feel comfortable around me though.” Yu smiled and decided to let his hand drop back to his side. He couldn’t get too touchy too quickly. It was good Yosuke at least felt comfortable around him, but that still wasn’t enough to get those memories back yet. The last thing he wanted was to make a wrong move and scare him off.

The idea that people were so comfortable around the person that was supposedly his best friend made Yosuke feel a set of emotions. One was that he was telling the truth, second he was understanding because the guy was really chill and nice, but third was…jealousy?

It was the smallest twinge, but it was enough for Yosuke to not like the idea of this sort of treatment being done to anyone else. Yosuke was always inwardly selfish in that aspect, but only his shadow had ever made such things known…to himself and Teddie. That memory was fuzzy too though, so he decided to trail back to the present.

“Uh anyways, so like, I don’t have to stay here. I mean yeah it’s a little weird since Teddie is staying with Kanji now but-“

“Well if you ever want to, the door is always open for you.”

Yosuke nodded, still unmoving from his spot next to the other as he liked hearing those words.

“By the way, since you forgot about our plans, you need to start bringing your stuff over here.”

“My stuff…what stuff?”

“Well, you were supposed to be moving to the city with me to start college next month.”

“I was? I knew I was going to the city, but I didn’t know about that.”

“Obviously.” Yu scooped up a bit of the dessert. “Anyways, we’re leaving next Saturday, but we need to get all your stuff here before then.”

“Oh okay, well you don’t seem like a creepy guy, so I guess it’s okay for me to bring my stuff over.”

Yu rolled his eyes as more tiramisu was shoved into Yosuke’s mouth.

* * *

 

The few days after the dinner they had was filled with Yosuke working a few long shifts at Junes and going to the store a few times with the excuse of having to get groceries the first time and then having to take Nanako to lunch there for the second time. It was a convenient factor that Yosuke had been there both times; of course, they had been texting for that to happen.

Even though their conversations couldn’t really centralize around past occurrences, Yosuke always found a way to bring up some random thing happening in the present. That at least made their almost constant texting with one another semi-normal in a way.

Yu had his phone in hand later that evening as Nanako was sitting and watching her favorite game show. It was just like old times. Dojima was still out, probably out with a friend from work or still at work. He knew he was no longer drinking since he had decided to cut himself from it in order to better take care of Nanako and spend more time with her.

As he leaned against the kitchen counter, his phone gave a notification for another text received.

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _I get off in about an hour, but I don’t wanna go straight home. Wanna do something?_

 **Text Received from Yu:** Sure, I know the perfect place.

Yu smirked as he ran up the stairs and to his room to change.

An hour later, Yosuke was tugging on his jacket as he stood outside of Junes waiting for his friend to arrive. He didn’t even have to move to sit down when Yu rounded the corner and was standing there waiting for him.

“Right on time.”

“I don’t like keeping people waiting.”

Yosuke smiled, actually relieved and happy to see the person there smiling back at him.

“Okay so where are we going?”

“Well, it’s a place I heard about while I was still in the city.”

“What is it?”

“You’ll…see.”

Yosuke didn’t like how the other’s voice trailed off, or the slight smirk that appeared on his lips.

About ten minutes later, they had walked through the darkened streets of Inaba only to lead to darker dirt paths past the riverbank. Yosuke started fidgeting a little as they got close to one dirt path in particular. A large, dark manor resided past the overgrowth of trees in the lawn. Yu stood outside the gated area and looked at his companion.

“You up for it?”

“O-Oh god no, this place-Idon’tevengetthisclosetoit-”

“You’re the one who told me about it to begin with.”

“Y-Y-Yeah maybe but dude like, someone died in there, I don’t wanna go in there and get eaten or something!”

“But I’m with you, it’ll be fine.”

Yosuke couldn’t even protest as Yu had started fiddling with the lock on the gate, managing to at least push the gate open enough to slip underneath the chains. He stood on the other side giving a look to Yosuke for him to come on.

“I hate you so much right now.” Yosuke followed in the same manner, a little more clumsily as the chain hit his side when he stood up. Looking at the manor that was now even closer than before, he swallowed quickly and crossed his arms.

“Come on, let’s take a peek inside.”

“Of course. We’re not shopping for houses you know, do we really have to do this?”

As the brunette was almost whining in protest, his voice slowly died down into nothingness as they walked over the high traces of grass and gradually approached the darkened porch. Yosuke was beyond paranoid, glancing around and then looking at Yu to see him completely calm despite how fucking creepy the place was.

“Need me to hold your hand?”

Yosuke glared at him which only made Yu laugh softly. The silver-haired teen moved to turn the metal doorknob; the door creaking as he slowly pulled it open. As he reached into his jacket pocket, he pulled out a flashlight.

The light showed how dusty and deserted the house was. Cobwebs were scattered in various areas, and any furniture that was left had been covered with sheets that were too dusty to tell what color they even were to start with. As they took a few steps inside, Yosuke was barely taking a full step forward, already feeling the creepiness level rise every second they were there.

“How long are we staying here? Curiosity killed the cat y-you know?”

“Not much longer.” Yu proceeded further ahead.

“You really are like a cat. Too curious for your own good and you know what, I’d rather not see you get eaten by a ghost or something.”

“Ghosts don’t take a physical form, so that would be impossible.”

“Well that movie then, what was it, paranormal whatever, that chick killed her boyfriend.” Yosuke was adamant on his point as he was half-whispering his words and trailing closely behind the other.

“Yeah, and that was a demon that had possessed her.”

A loud thump further upstairs made them both stop suddenly in the center of the downstairs area. Yu had almost reached the stairs, but when he heard the noise they both instinctively stopped to listen. Yosuke was almost shaking now, trying to convince himself that it probably was just another creak from the old house.

But a second thump that sounded almost as if it had come from the second-floor hallway just near the stairs even made Yu stop and stare above. Another noise caused Yosuke to make a very strangled and low, yet high-pitched noise as he uncrossed his arms and latched onto the free arm of the one near him.

“The lady in black does not want us here, so can we please get the  _fuck_ out of here?”

Yu still remained unmoving, even more so as he felt Yosuke’s weight and warmth at his side. Their faces were close as he almost forgot about the possible presence of something else in the house. He stared at him for a few seconds, seeing how brown eyes were showing worry yet the way his lips suddenly parted a little made Yu think that maybe he wasn’t as focused on what was happening around them now too.

He could see how that bruise at his jawline had almost cleared up, the bandage on his cheek was no longer there, and all that remained was a small mark that would probably heal with time. The feeling of a heartbeat pressed against his upper arm suddenly picked up, and before he could say anything else that had nothing to do with the situation at hand, a creaky thump came directly from the top of the stairs. As they stood at the bottom of the stairs, it didn’t even take two seconds for them to process anything before they were turning and running out the front door.

“Shit-shit- ** _shit_** -“

Yosuke was flying out the door and down the porch, glancing back to see Yu had slammed the front door shut (it was only polite to do so) before running to the gate and sliding under it seconds after Yosuke had. They didn’t even look back as they ran down the dirt path and back to the main road.

* * *

 

Monday morning was a bit of a blur to Yu. He had woken up, gone downstairs to see Dojima and Nanako already in the middle of cooking in the kitchen. It was strange seeing Nanako big enough to do such things on her own now; it had only been a little over a year. It was even weirder seeing Dojima making eggs.

As he got himself a glass of orange juice, he was being informed about how him and Nanako were planning on going out on a picnic in the next town over and staying overnight to go to the zoo there the next day.

“You can come if you want, but you don’t have to if you’d rather stay here.”

“No, I mean yeah I’ll come. It’s something new.”

Nanako seemed in even higher spirits than before now as she started talking about the animals at the zoo.

Later that afternoon when they were loading up the car, he had just put his bag in the back of the car as his phone vibrated. Pulling it out, he saw he had a message from Yosuke. As he opened it, he couldn’t help but to smile.

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _I still hate you for dragging me to that place last night._

 **Text Received from Yu:** You hate me enough to text me about it?

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _Yes. Shut up._

 **Text Received from Yu:** Did you sleep okay? Didn’t get eaten or anything?

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _SHUT UP!_

Yu was about to reply when he received a second text.

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _No but really, what are you doing today?_

 **Text Received from Yu:** I’m going out of town with my uncle and Nanako. We should be back tomorrow evening.

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _Oh well have a good time; I’ll see you when you get back?_

 **Text Received from Yu:** Don’t miss me too much.

Yosuke stared at the words of the text message he had just gotten. Would he miss him? Probably not, this was just someone that he had met only 5 days ago. Even if they knew each other before and he got weird feelings every now and then, or his heart started acting all stupid and he couldn’t stop from blushing almost all the time…no he wouldn’t miss him while he was gone.

He wouldn’t because he already  _did_  miss him.

It made no sense to him. That evening at work, all Yosuke could do was constantly find something to get his hands on in order to distract himself. The thoughts still occurred though, only going deeper and deeper as time went on. Every day so far since the accident, he had been longing to see the one that was apparently his best friend. The first thing he wanted to do when he woke up was text him, and sometimes his hand would just reach for the phone and do it without even realizing it until he had already sent the message. It was like his body was on auto-pilot, his subconscious working in a way that relayed all those subtle facts to be true.

He must have known him before; they must have been best friends. Just from how they interacted so comfortably with one another already showed some of that. Yu knew things that he hadn’t told anyone, ever, but that still didn’t explain the way he would get so flustered and embarrassed around him so easily. Not to mention last night at the house.

He had grabbed onto him out of fear. But the way he had felt after getting so close to Yu, it made him start to wonder just how deep their bond ran. Maybe it had only been one-sided, maybe Yosuke had felt a certain way about him, which he hoped he hadn’t because that would just cause so many problems. But remembering how grey eyes had been looking at him in that close proximity, he hadn’t been able to look away, and it almost seemed like something else was going to happen.

What he didn’t know, nor did he want to think about it. Okay so maybe he had thought about it, but that doesn’t meant it would’ve been the right thing. The guy made him feel a weird way. He was nice to look at, really polite, sweet even, and Yosuke just loved being around him. Even just 5 days later, he loved it enough to feel like he had a hole in his life somehow.

Going home to an empty house that evening hadn’t been as hard as it was that night. Walking up the stairs to his room only triggered the moment from the night before at the end of those stairs in the house. Being so close to Yu, almost half-wanting for that something to happen, and as he reached his room he wanted nothing more than to get a text asking to hang out that evening. He knew it wasn’t going to happen though.

Speaking of Yu, he had been having a nice day out with his uncle and cousin. The picnic they had near a lake had been relaxing. He and Nanako had gone paddle boating together, and Dojima had been doing one of the general dad habits of recording it with his camera.

When they got the hotel that evening, Yu had taken to a pull-out bed in the couch as Nanako and Dojima slept in their own beds nearby. With Dojima snoring a little, his iPod suddenly became his best friend and he put in his ear buds before laying and staring at the ceiling.

The whole day he had been doing other things, but somehow he would still find himself straying back to Yosuke. Wondering how he was doing, what he was doing after he got off work, if he had eaten something half-way decent for dinner. Overall, just worrying and wondering, even missing him. That came naturally though, because even as friends he still missed Yosuke’s presence.

He wanted to text him, but he knew if he started to that he would probably be up all night doing so. Rolling over on his side, he closed his eyes and tried to let his favorite song put him to sleep.

The next morning came faster than expected, and when he rolled over to check the time on his phone, he saw he had a new message.

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _Can I make a reservation with you sir?_

With a roll of his eyes and smile forming on his lips, he responded back to the text that he had apparently gotten last night.

 **Text Received from Yu:** Depends on what it is.

As he sat up from bed, he noticed Dojima wasn’t in the room but Nanako was sitting on the bed, already fully dressed.

“You’re awake, good morning!”

“Good morning.” He rubbed his hair while pushing the sheets off of him and standing up to go brush his teeth.

“Dad went to put our stuff in the car, we’re leaving soon.”

“I better hurry up then.”

Yu went through a quicker routine of getting ready, not even bothering to blow-dry his hair and letting it dry naturally instead. As they left shortly after that, the hotel wasn’t that far from the zoo.

The day was just as sunny as the one before, Nanako in high spirits as she held onto Yu’s hand and was running through the entrance. They went through every exhibit, spending more time on the birds and arctic animals since they were Nanako’s favorite. The koalas was another one they spent a lot of time on, and that was then Yu had gotten a reply from the one he had kept checking his phone over all morning.

 **Text Received from Yosuke:** _I wanted to see if you wanted to go to the movies tomorrow? I’ll try to keep my hands to myself this time. :P_

Yu knew that had to be in reference to the haunted house incident.

 **Text Received from Yu:** Sure we can do that, but you don’t have to keep your hands to yourself.

On the other end of things, Yosuke blushed darkly and felt a weird shudder go through him at reading the reply. It was just playful, nothing else.

 **Text Received from Yosuke _:_** _Well maybe I won’t then. ;]_

 **Text Received from Yu:** You never did before.

Yu hit the send button before he could add a cute face of his own on the end of his sentence. He had gotten distracted suddenly with Nanako tugging on his arm for him to come and feed a giraffe with her. Just as he slipped his phone back into his pocket, he started following after her, nearly bumping into a girl that was walking nearby.

“Oh, excuse me sorry.”

“No problem.” She looked at him, giving him a quick smile before walking away.

Meanwhile Yosuke was left in a semi freak-out at the text he had just received.

He never did before? So he’s saying that before, as in when they remembered each other, Yosuke had never kept his hands to himself around him? There was no playful face at the end of the remark; Yosuke wasn’t sure how to take the message. He didn’t want to take it out of context, but right now it certainly felt like that’s what it was meant as.

Did that mean they had…fooled around? Maybe it was nothing serious, maybe they had just experimented or something? Or maybe Yosuke just slipped up one day and had touched him accidentally. Yeah, that’s probably what it was. So far they hadn’t crossed any sort of boundaries like that, why would they, they were just really good friends.

Yosuke set down his video game controller and started thinking on it.

Just  _how_  good of friends were they though?

The night they had dinner together at Yu’s house, when their legs had touched under the table, neither of them had made any sort of move to pull away, much less to even voice it as awkward. Then there were just the simple moments of staring at each other than he normally would’ve looked at anyone else. The main thing was the night at the house. Yosuke just couldn’t get over how he had felt better just being that close to Yu, having one of those long stares again, and it had made him think of what could’ve happened next if it hadn’t been for the looming threat of possession.

Maybe something had happened before. Maybe they had gotten drunk one night or something or they were just overly truthful one night or were just playfully fighting and rolling around…he had so many scenarios in his mind and none of them were fitting, yet that feeling of  _maybe_  started to feel like a yes.

The more he tortured himself with the not knowing aspect, the more he wanted to just see Yu again and let things unfold however they did. If it didn’t happen then fine, but he couldn’t keep going with these thoughts and never having them lead anywhere. He needed a straight answer, even if that answer would be anything but straight.

* * *

 

Yosuke was nervous as headed down the escalator and to the movies directly next to it. As soon as he took a step off the moving stairs, he saw a familiar color of silver and knew it was Yu.

“Hey.”

“Hey sorry I’m a little late, work was crazy today.”

“No problem. I already got our tickets.”

Yu held up the two tickets with a smile as Yosuke smiled back, feeling that flutter in his stomach already.

“So how much did you miss me?”

They were walking through the entrance and into the lobby now, heading over to the refreshment and snack line. Yosuke shifted his back on his back more as he glanced at the menu, trying not to have his cheeks darken from the question.

“Not enough for you to brag about.”

“Hmm that still implies that you did miss me though.” Yu tilted his head a little, watching at how fair-skin cheeks were getting a little redder. The sight made him smile more.

“Okay-okay so  _maybe_  I did. But I missed your cooking more.” Yosuke half-way mumbled the first sentence, but he retorted with a slightly triumphant air during the second one as he saw Yu make a gesture of pretending to be hurt.

“Oh Yosuke you slay me with such atrocities-“

“Hey!”

A sudden shout in their direction caused them to look to their left, seeing two girls walking over to them.

“Hey, you’re the guy I saw at the zoo yesterday.”

Yu had to think back for a second, barely recognizing the girl as the one he had almost bumped into.

“Oh right, sorry about almost running into you again.”

“It’s okay. So um, we were wondering what movie you two were seeing?”

“We got tickets to see Warm Bodies.”

“Oh so did we!” The blonde-headed girl held up their tickets as proof. “Do you mind if we sit with you?”

“Yeah zombies just scare me.” The other girl with red hair chimed in as she stared at Yu.

“It’s not even a real zombie movie though.”

“I don’t see why you can’t sit with us.”

Yu being as generous as he was couldn’t turn down two girls who seemed nice enough. The sudden, brief look he had gotten from Yosuke though made him wonder how good of an idea it was though. As they reached the counter and got their drinks and some popcorn, the blonde girl had somehow managed to get even closer to Yu, almost clinging onto him as they walked into the theater.

Yosuke ended up on the left side of Yu with each girl sitting on either side of them.

“They’re not going to be scary right?”

The red-haired girl, her name was Yuki? He couldn’t even remember. Yosuke was too distracted with sipping on his drink and staring out of the corner of his eye at the girl who was steadily putting the moves on Yu in the way of the girl code. Subtle touches, giggles, and alluring looks.

Yosuke only knew such things because at one point he had been completely girl crazy. The way she was reacting to Yu was how he had always wanted a girl to act with himself. Being just friends, Yosuke should’ve been happy for him, even helping him like a wing man. But, he was jealous. At first he figured he was just jealous that he was getting attention from a pretty good-looking girl, he thought he was just envious.

The previews were pretty much done by the time they had initially sat down. As the movie started, Yosuke had barely managed to pay attention to the first five minutes of it. The credits were unimportant, so he kept to acting as if he was looking for something in his bag on the ground, stealing glances to the side to see the girl’s leg already pressing along Yu’s own.

Tearing his gaze away, he leaned back in his seat, deciding to try and focus on just the movie and not the girl steadily clawing her way into his friend, no best friend. Yosuke swallowed uneasily.

Yu had been trying to get the girl to stay in her own proximity of the chair so far. He kept whispering for her to watch the movie, that it was going to be a good movie. She just wasn’t listening though. Her hands were touching at his arm, he could feel how her leg was touching his own, and about half-way into the movie he felt her lips at his ear and a whisper of how they should move further to the back.

As much as the prospect might’ve appealed to him a few years ago before the time that he had met the one sitting to his left, he simply shook his head silently in response. The girl gave a slightly defeated look with a shrug, sitting back in her seat as she pulled out her phone to text.

Yu glanced over at Yosuke, seeing how tense he was even as he was slouched down in his seat with his arms crossed. As he saw the red-head get up and the other girl soon follow after, he watched as they left the theater.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

The simple, quick response with not a single hint of his normal tone already tipped Yu off that something was indeed wrong.

Deciding the atmosphere of the movie was already pretty much ruined for them, he stood up.

“Lets go.”

“What? But the movie isn’t even over yet.”

“Are you really watching it?”

Yosuke said nothing as he grabbed his bag from the floor and steadily followed after him out of the theater.

Nothing was said as they left and headed back to the station to get a ride back home. Night had already taken over, and the monorail was almost empty as they entered one of the cars and headed back to Inaba. Looking over at Yosuke, he could see how he was just staring at one spot at the other side of the car.

Yu sat next to him, not even sure what to say. It was clear that Yosuke hadn’t liked what happened just then, but what was he supposed to do in response to make him feel better? He didn’t know if he had been jealous or just upset that their evening out was ruined in a way. Even if he was jealous, Yu didn’t know how to go about resolving it. He couldn’t just touch him or kiss him; it would surely make him uneasy, especially since Yosuke had no remembrance of their relationship.

When they reached the station, Yosuke turned and started heading in the completely opposite direction of Yu.

“Where are you going? I thought you were staying over?”

“Yeah, I’m not really feeling up to it now.”

Yu slipped into a calm, blank expression as he couldn’t even think of anything to say in return.

“I’ll see you later.” Yosuke mumbled and turned again, heading down the street and on the memorized route to his house.

The remainder of the evening was comprised of Yu constantly just wondering around the house thinking. He often did this when he had the house to himself and a huge worry or thought weighing on him. Pacing back and forth from his room, then working his way down the stairs and into the living room. He eventually ended up sitting at the end of the stairs that led to the second floor, chin on his hands as he stared ahead at the wall.

This was a critical point in their reforming friendship. It was starting to get pushed the point of being more than just a friendship, well in Yu’s eyes at least. Technically it had already been well beyond that before the accident, but Yosuke had to play catch up. It was clear that Yosuke had been feeling  _some_  kind of way, with his mannerisms being as they were back before they had confessed to each other about their feelings for one another.

The movie date would’ve been a good build up to staying over. Surely something would’ve happened, not even sexual, just something for Yosuke to start realizing that things weren’t just platonic between them. They were best friends first yes; this much had always been true. But there was that leap that led to even more beyond that, and Yu was hoping he could start to slip in small realizations of that even if it had just been in mere flirting.

Glancing at the clock on the wall nearby, it was already almost one in the morning. Deciding to try and force himself to sleep, he got up and moved to turn off the lights downstairs. Heading back up to the stairs, he had only just taken a few steps up when he heard a sudden pounding on the front door.

Moving back downstairs, he looked through the small hole to see who it was. Not even realizing it had been raining, Yu only then realized how lost in his thoughts he had been. Quickly unlocking the door, he opened it to see Yosuke standing in front of him, completely soaked from the rain outside.

“Yosuke-“

“Look just let me say this, I have to or else I’ll just, I can’t take it.” Yosuke paused and then finally looked up from the ground. “I didn’t like it.”

“Didn’t like what?”

“I didn’t like how she kept touching you and stuff. I just didn’t, I don’t know why but I just didn’t and it really hurts-“ Yosuke was almost yelling as he water dripped from his hair as he kept shaking his head as if to emphasize his point.

“I didn’t even like her.”

“It doesn’t matter; I didn’t like someone being close to you like that!”

Yosuke yelled, a sharp sound of thunder clapping through the sky as they locked gazes with one another.

Yu swallowed quickly, clutching and unclutching his hand into a fist before he boldly took a few steps forward, grabbing onto both sides of the brunette’s face to press a kiss full of longing and restrained feelings onto his wet lips.

For a moment, Yosuke didn’t move. He felt the touch and warmth, the way lips were sliding over his. The storm around him suddenly became drowned out as he closed his eyes, hands moving up to grip at the sides of the white t-shirt the other had on. He let his lips press back into the kiss, suddenly feeling so warm, feeling that sense of familiar all over again and it only grew as they stumbled back into the house, the door slamming in their wake.

“Why does everything feel so right with you?” Yosuke was a jumble of thoughts voicing themselves, barely feeling in touch with reality as he was pushed back against the closet door, hot kisses incessantly being given to him to which he eagerly responded each time.

Yu said nothing in response to every thought that he heard though. It wasn’t for him to fill in the gaps for Yosuke. All he could do was provide the possible triggers for his memory to come back. The feelings were there, and he could feel it as they kissed harder, almost hungrily, the need to taste each other becoming dire each time they pressed closer.

“I can never stop thinking about you…partner.” Yosuke whispered out uneasily as he felt their hips press together. It made his own hands move forward, undoing the button on the other’s pants. As he unzipped them and slipped his hand inside, he met grey eyes that were hazy with desire.

“Then don’t.” Yu felt the hand grasping onto him, it was moving the way that it always had before. It was so strange how even though the memories weren’t there for Yosuke, the way he moved and touched was still completely the same.

Yu forced their mouths together again in a heated kiss, tongues licking almost messily as he had Yosuke pressed completely against the door. His own hand undid the brunette’s pants, pushing down inside to pull his erection out, stroking over him, rubbing at the tip in the way that he knew Yosuke would always whimper over. The subtlest sound of such a whimper was heard as they parted from the kiss, a trail of saliva still between them even afterward.

Neither cared, both too preoccupied with touching each other, stroking each other either on instinct or fully knowing how it would please the other. Yu was working rough kisses along Yosuke’s neck, biting in the areas that he knew were sensitive, and practically had him bucking into his hand as his fingers were layered with pre-cum.

Yosuke was moaning none-too-quietly, his whole body heated despite how wet he was from the rain. He could hardly restrain himself as he was completely enveloped in Yu. Stroking over the hardness in his own grasp, he could sense how Yu was growing closer as well, and that alone made Yosuke breathe out uneasy moans along with the other’s name.

Mere seconds later, Yosuke scratched at the door with his free hand, his body tensing up and then trembling as he felt himself start to release onto the hand that was still stroking over him so perfectly. It made him dizzy in a way, but he still couldn’t stop himself from moaning Yu’s name over and over again uneasily with every spurt of cum that was released.

Yu was close behind, watching the brunette in his release which only triggered his own. He always loved watching Yosuke finish first, just so he could see how hot he looked when he did, and the noises and way Yosuke would say his name was a bonus. Yu echoed out in a rough moan, whispering Yosuke’s name alongside his hear as he let his cum cover Yosuke’s hand in return.

They were both breathing heavily, leaning against one another for support as they let the pleasure turn into a relaxing aftermath. Yu pulled away, staring at Yosuke closely.

“Feel better?”

“Y-Yeah…do you?” Yosuke became flustered as he felt the cum on his hand which he found to be arousing.

Yu smiled, laughing a little under his breath as he leaned in to press a softer kiss on Yosuke’s lips. It was so gentle and lingering that Yosuke found himself closing his eyes and falling more into the feelings that he felt like had always been there somehow.

* * *

 

“So there’s this festival being held at the shrine tonight.”

“I thought they only had festivals during holidays?”

“They do, but they decided to start having one every month just for fun.”

“Are you asking me to be your date Yosuke-kun?” Yu fluttered his eyes a bit as he took a piece of chicken between his chop sticks.

“Oh wow okay don’t ever do that again.” He had strangely sounded just like a girl. It gave him a weird feeling of de-ja-vu again too.

“It’s fun though.” Yu smirked as he chewed on his piece of chicken thoughtfully before swallowing and speaking again. “But back to your original suggestion, we can go if you want to.”

“Well it’d just be something to do, plus it’d get me out of any of your weird ideas. I don’t want to go into anymore haunted places again.”

Yu had a witty retort in terms of the ‘weird ideas’, but he decided to hold off on it. They had just made huge progress last night with Yosuke recognizing that there was something between them. He didn’t know the full extent, but he at least knew the feelings were there which was a start.

The rest of the night they had eventually ended up in his room, laying in the futon just staring at each other, kissing and touching every now and again until both of them passed out from exhaustion. It was really a nice night, one that he wished he could add on a list to relive over and over again if possible.

Today though, was going by pretty fast so far. They had slept until well past noon, and only now were eating something. The festival was going to start relatively early given that it was getting dark earlier now. Deciding to stick with relaxing at the house until they went out later, Yu had taken up Yosuke’s other suggestion of gaming.

Yu had an unfair advantage as previously stated, already knowing what Yosuke’s usual strategies were in almost every game. The only ones that he didn’t end up beating Yosuke in with the unfair advantage were the co-ops and that was simply because Yosuke was better at shooting, but not so much at running ahead alone and ending up getting killed.

Even though they were concentrated on the game, they’d both still find little ways to slip in a touch here and there. Yu would lean over at times to whisper things in Yosuke’s ear which would get him distracted and he’d miss a shot. Yosuke would retaliate, so much so that at one point he just set his controller down and climbed onto Yu’s lap, kissing him suddenly and the game was forgotten for a good hour.

When the time came around to head out to the festival, that was when things slowly started taking a detour.

They had been having steady progress; things were improving almost drastically, enough to where Yu had high hopes that Yosuke would remember everything sooner or later. The feelings had been in place, they’d been acted on, so it was only a matter of time.

Or so he thought.

The moment they reached the shrine, Yosuke had taken a few steps away from Yu.

When they started passing people, Yosuke was constantly looking around.

And when Yu went to touch his arm just to get his attention, Yosuke flinched away.

The sudden remembrance of Yosuke’s paranoia slapped him back into reality.

Even though Yosuke didn’t remember anything about him or their relationship, Yosuke still had that paranoia that someone was always watching him. Someone was always watching, waiting, and would go and tell his parents that he wasn’t out with a girl, wasn’t holding hands with a girl, or kissing a girl. The fear that a rumor might start, or his parents would find out had always made Yosuke restrain himself in public with Yu before the accident, and that was still proving to be true even now regardless of the circumstances.

Yosuke couldn’t afford to have those two sides of himself mixed together. He’d done all he could to keep both sides separated, both words completely closed off from one another. If his parents ever knew, they would surely disown him. They already had such a close eye on him, constantly telling him that he had to do this, to live this way. He never had a choice about it, and that was why whenever Yukiko had confronted her shadow that he had so much empathy for her.

As he stood at the booth with the fish bowls, so many smiling faces were around them, and turning to see those grey eyes, he knew he should be smiling just as much. But he couldn’t. That sinking realization that things would never have a chance to expand further than just the confines of a bedroom or house made him suddenly feel like he shouldn’t be there. Not in that moment, not with that person, none of it.

“Are you okay?”

Once again, Yu went to reach out but even he hesitated and ended up letting his hand fall back at his side. He could already tell just by seeing Yosuke, the look in his eyes, that something wasn’t right.

“Yeah just, suddenly not feeling very well. I think I should go home.”

“Do you want me to walk you home-“

“No, I’ll be fine.”

“Okay, text me when you get home.”

Yosuke turned around almost numbly, heading away from the shrine, almost running as soon as he was out of sight of it. Returning home, he saw the lights on in his house. The sudden dread that he had before came back tenfold.

When he entered the house, he saw his parents sitting in the living room. His mother stood up and walked over to hug him just as his dad stayed seated, only sparing a glance over to him.

“Have you been recovering okay? We were just so busy in those negotiations.”

“Yeah I’ve been fine. Just been resting a lot between working.” Yosuke lied as he decided to avoid any more uncomfortable communication and went to head upstairs.

“The owner of the company that we are going to be merging with has a daughter. We thought it would be a good idea for you two to go out together sometime.” The words from his mother made him tense up as he let his foot rest on the first step.

“If you marry her that’ll be even better.” His dad chimed in after that, still not moving his eyes from the TV screen.

“Uh okay…sure.” Yosuke was almost speechless as he headed upstairs, moving into his room quickly and closing the door to slide down against it onto the floor.

Just seeing his parents had been enough of a slap for him to see that he couldn’t do anything he wanted to do. He’d never be able to have a real relationship with Yu, even if he wanted to. Those feelings weren’t right, he couldn’t keep them, and he had to force them away somehow.

But no matter how much he tried to convince himself of that, he knew that the pain in his heart would never allow him to do so.

* * *

 

_And if I lose you_

_I’m afraid I would lose who_

_Who I gave my love to._

Yu never got a text from Yosuke.

He had eventually sent him one, asking if he had gotten home okay. The only response he got was the next afternoon, saying that he did and that he needed to meet up with him at Aiyas soon.

Deciding that maybe Yosuke just needed some time alone, Yu steadily got ready and was soon on his way to Aiyas at the arranged time. Seeing Yosuke standing outside, he felt a little relieved, but when he saw the tired look in brown eyes he became worried.

They took a seat at a table in the back, which was unusual since they typically sat at the bar. After the waitress had left to put in their orders, Yu stared at Yosuke.

“What’s going on with you?”

“Nothing just-“

“It’s clearly something. I mean you left last night out of nowhere, didn’t even text me back, and now you’re acting differently.”

Yosuke went silent for a few moments as the waitress brought their drinks and left again.

“I guess, I realized some things.”

“What things exactly?”

Yosuke fiddled with his straw, moving it through his soda but never taking a drink.

“Look, this can’t go anywhere.”

“What do you mean?”

Yosuke’s voice lowered. “Whatever was going on with us, it  ** _can’t_**  happen.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because my life isn’t that simple. My parents already have all this shit planned out for me, and if they knew I liked…if they knew they wouldn’t approve.”

“So? They don’t have to know until you’re comfortable enough to tell them. I’m not going to pressure you Yosuke.”

“Yeah well, I still feel too weird about it. If we slipped up even once and someone saw, that’d be it.”

“So what…that’s it then? We’re supposed to just forget about what happened the other night?”

Yosuke turned his head as he tried not to think about it.

“And what about all the other nights?”

“What are you talking about?”

Yu scoffed, suddenly feeling that thread of hope becoming thinner and thinner as the conversation continued.

“The other thing that happened at the riverside, you don’t remember what it was.”

“What was it?”

Yu breathed out, looking down for a moment before meeting brown eyes as he spoke firmly.

“We had been at this party during the holidays last December. You got jealous because of a girl that had been talking to me, and you dragged me out to the porch outside. I kissed you there, and you kissed me back. That was all that was needed, but even afterward more things happened. We left and went to the riverbank, and that…”

Yu had to pause as he tried to keep his calm demeanor despite feeling how his voice was starting to crack.

“…You told me you loved me then, that you had as far back as a month after we first met. I told you I loved you too, for just as long. I told you that I always chose to spend so much time with you and no one else because no one could make me feel as happy as you did, that no one could even compare to how how much you make me enjoy every day no matter what we’re doing and how much better you make me.”

“But you don’t remember, you don’t remember any of this. You don’t remember how much I loved you then and still do now. How many nights we stayed up talking on the phone all night, falling asleep on the phone because we missed each other that much. You don’t remember how we planned to go back to the city together, to go to the same college, to live together.”

Yu lost his control, slamming his fist against the table before tearing his gaze away as he held back his emotions as best he could. The last thing he wanted to do was to cause a scene, or to start crying in public.

Yosuke was feeling the aftershocks of the overflow of information that had just been made known to him. All of this had been hidden; he had been keeping this from him, probably for his own good. But still, he couldn’t remember. If he could maybe things would’ve been different, but he couldn’t. It killed him to see this person, who was such a good person, someone that really was his best friend and maybe more, he had to see him crumbling slowly, and there was nothing he could do but get up from the table and start to leave.

“I don’t remember…I wish I did…I’m sorry.”

The restaurant suddenly became so empty to Yu as he heard the door open and close. Looking back up in front of him to see nothing but an empty chair.

* * *

 

  
_In too deep, can't think about giving it up_   
_But I never knew love would feel like a heart attack_   
_It's killing me, swear I never cried so much_   


Yosuke returned home, becoming a recluse as he stayed in his bed for a full day. He started on day two, realizing he had to go into work but made up an excuse that he was feeling sick. Seeing as he had been relatively ‘good’ in his parent’s eyes lately, he let him skip the shift.

In a way he was sick. The guilt that he didn’t know existed started to hit him harder and harder every time he recalled the conversation from before. They had been in a relationship together, a very serious one at that. Best friends and a relationship, Yu had to of been someone very important to him. Probably the most important person in his life at all.

The fact that he couldn’t remember anything about him was crushing. He knew that Yu had to be going through the worst end of it though, and that made Yosuke feel even guiltier. There was nothing he could do though. The feelings were there, in a strange, lingering way they were there. But there was too much pressure, too many other factors in his life making him hold off from taking that possible leap forward.

But why should he have to let one thing run his life?

Lying in his bed, he had his headphones on in an attempt to drown out his never-ending cycle of thoughts.

His parents were important yes. But then again, apparently Yu had been important to him too.

The way he had described things from their supposed past, it made him start to think Yu must’ve been the most important person in his life. If that was the case though, why did he restrain himself like he did? Why did he let all the other unimportant things take reign instead? Shouldn’t he have put Yu first like he probably always had for Yosuke?

Suddenly feeling the need to get out, he slipped his headphones down around his neck. Looking around his room, it was so empty, despite it feeling suffocating in that moment. He had moved most of his stuff out, into boxes and a few duffle bags and taken it over to the Dojima residence a few days beforehand in preparation for their move to the city.

Remembering that made him wish things hadn’t gone the way they had. He didn’t really have a choice about going, seeing as; the scholarship he had somehow gotten for an essay he had written had covered pretty much all of his expenses. For the next four years, he’d have to face Yu every day, still having those feelings, and constantly having to avoid acting on them.

Leaving his room, he started heading down the stairs, deciding to get something to drink. Before he had even reached halfway down the stairs, he could hear his parents talking.

“I know she’s in the same city, so it would just be so convenient.”

Yosuke steadily walked from the stairs and into the kitchen. As his parents were at the table talking, he could feel them look at him as he moved to the fridge.

“Yosuke, we were just talking about Ayane.”

“Ayane?” Yosuke was focusing more on finding the carton of juice than what his mother was saying.

“Yes, she’s the girl we mentioned before. You know she’s going to be living close to where you will be moving to.”

“Yeah?” The words were heard but Yosuke still wasn’t really listening as he pulled out the carton and went to get a glass.

“You need to go out with her. I really think it would be good for you.” The low voice of his dad made him suddenly listen more to what they were saying. The key words that stuck out to him were ‘it would be good for you’.

“She’s so nice, very beautiful, and she’s talented as well. She can play the piano and is quite the cook apparently.” His mother interjected almost wistfully as Yosuke poured some juice into his glass before sipping it and staring at the sink.

“You should stop spending so much time with that Narukami kid and go out with her instead. Make better use of your time.”

“Yes dear honestly, it’s so weird that you spend so much time with him. I know you’re best friends, but there really is a limit before it starts seeming wrong.”

Yosuke felt the glass slip from his hand as he blinked up from the sink. The sudden crash of the dishes, the glass cracking and breaking made him stop breathing for a second. Something happened, not even like an adrenaline rush, but it was enough to send a massive shock to his entire body. His mind reeled, feeling the sharpest rush of flashbacks, feeling the sting of remembrance make him lean against the sink, his hands barely supporting him as his eyes went wide.

In that moment, he remembered.

He remembered everything, from when he first met Yu, to when they confronted his shadow together. The first time they helped one another up in battle, or when they started getting closer and closer in their relationship until they became best friends that day at the riverbank. He remembered how Yu was always there for him, always there smiling at him, always making his days better.

He remembered how he had given his life meaning, how he had made him want to do everything he could to make Yu just as happy as he was. He remembered the first time they kissed, and the first time they had said they loved each other that night after the party. Along the riverbank, Yosuke was almost in tears again as he confessed the three words that he had been longing to say for so long. He remembered how Yu said he loved him back, and how ever since they had been nothing but happy with one another.

The blood from the his fingertip drew him back to reality though. They were happy yes, but there were still restraints. The ever-present reminder that he was supposed to live up to his parents expectations made him suddenly see how petty it all was. The one person that mattered the most, the one person who’s wishes, dreams, and happiness mattered the most, those weren’t being fulfilled completely. Up until that point, they hadn’t been fulfilled, but now, now that he remembered, he’d be damned if he let a single moment more pass without Yu and himself being truly happy.

“No…” He whispered at first. “No…” He spoke loud enough to be heard just barely. “…No!” The emotion rang throughout the room this time, catching both his parents attention. “I remember-I remember, I remember why I never told you this.”

“Told us what-“ Yosuke whirled around, staring back and forth between the two people sitting at the table.

“I’m in love with ‘ _that kid’_ , Yu, Narukami Yu, my  _best friend_ , and he’s also a guy-yes a  **guy**.” He breathed in, his chest moving as quickly as his mouth was; every single thing that he had ever felt or held back was bursting at the seams. “I never told you, because I knew how you’d react, I  _knew_  how you were trying to fit me into some perfectly shaped out life. But you know what; I’m not going to fit into that life, I  ** _never_**  will. I’m not going to sacrifice my happiness just to meet your standards of how  **you**  think  **I** should  _live_.”

He saw his father start to stand, and before he could even get a word in, Yosuke stepped even closer to him as if to invade his personal space as he spoke. “You can disown me; you can throw me out and never think of me as a son again. I wouldn’t care because I already have a family, and I have someone who loves me,  **all of me** , every single part, no matter how terrible or fucked up it might be, and I love him back just as much, for  ** _all_**  that he is. I’m not going to let  _this_  control me anymore.”

He couldn’t even label his family with the proper pronoun. He could only call it ‘ ** _this_** ’. The sudden realization of how detached he was from them, how much they never even knew him as person, made him see how they had no right to even contribute a single idea to how his life should go. And so, he left. Not a word was said as he grabbed his coat from the closet near the front door and left, not even bothering to grab his keys as he did so. He had no intention of ever returning to that place again.

Yosuke could hardly run through the streets fast enough. He was trying not to cry along the way, wiping away a stray tear every now and again. Not out of sadness though, out of complete happiness that he remembered. He took a short-cut through the shopping district, not even taking a second glance at Junes and the reminder of his former family now. The only thing that mattered was just a few minutes away now.

And just as he approached the top of that hill and began to descend down it gradually, he could see the outline of someone near the car parked outside the Dojima residence. The familiar mass of grey hair, Yu was turned away as he was placing a few more boxes in the trunk of the car in preparation for their trip the next morning.

“Yu!”

With his back turned away, Yu suddenly gripped at both sides of the box, simply hearing the way his name was said. It made him completely forget what he was previously doing, the box falling from his hand and to the ground as he turned and saw Yosuke steadily approaching in a run.

He didn’t even have to say anything for him to know this was Yosuke, his Yosuke. Just seeing his eyes, hearing the way he had said his name with that tone of emotion that he hadn’t heard for almost an entire month now-it made Yu turn and meet him halfway in a run.

Yosuke practically jumped forward into his arms, Yu catching him in a tight embrace. They clutched onto one another as if nothing else mattered, Yu leaning in to start a kiss that had already been started the moment they looked at one another.

“I love you so much Yosuke,  ** _so fucking much_**.” Tears were stinging at his eyes as he kept pressing kisses on Yosuke’s cheeks and then back to his lips, repeating the process over and over again, never releasing that tight grasp on him. “I was so scared you’d never remember me again, that I’d never get to  _tell_  you that again.”

“I love you too Yu, I’m sorry I put you through that,  _so sorry_  I-“

Yu cut off any other unnecessary apologies with the deepest kiss that had ever taken place between them thus far. It lasted for so long, Yosuke almost laughing in between with happiness as he could feel the smile from Yu pressed over his lips.

“You made me fall in love with you all over again. You know that right?” Yosuke whispered as he was still clinging at the sides of the one who was embracing him.

“Really?”

“Well…I’m pretty sure it’s a third time now.”

“Three times? How did I manage to do that?”

“The first time is a given. The second time, even though I technically couldn’t remember you, I still fell in love with you again.”

“And the third?” Yu whispered back over his lips, staring at him with a loving gaze.

“I fell in love with you again just now, because you never gave up on me…on  _us_.”

Yosuke gave him a look in return, starting to lean in just as Yu did as well. They shared a soft kiss, letting more of their formerly repressed emotions be felt. They stayed that way, in each other’s arms, feeling one another’s heart beat as their lips moved together now and again.

When Yu finally pulled away and got Yosuke to help him finish loading the car, Yu picked up the box he had dropped and set it in the backseat before looking over at him.

“Well just so you know, you’re never crossing the street alone again.”

Yosuke huffed trying to pout which only resulted in him smiling, even laughing as he instinctively leaned in for a kiss.

*** Two weeks later.**

“What did I tell you?”

Yosuke stood at the start of a crosswalk, waiting with a hand on his hip as Yu approached his side.

“I can’t cross the street alone ever again. I know that tragic thing happened with me losing my memory for a while there, but I highly doubt all the cars in Tokyo are out to run me over.”

“True. But this just gives me an excuse to hold your hand...”

Yu held out his hand, looking up to meet Yosuke’s gaze as he felt a hand intertwine with his own without hesitation. A smile formed on Yosuke’s lips as the indicator allowed them to cross, and they started to cross the street.

Yu leaned over, pressing a soft kiss to the side of Yosuke’s head as he whispered to him thereafter.

“…And because now, if you go, I go.”

“Can’t live without me?”

“No. And I know you couldn’t live without me either.”

“This is turning into a bad form of Romeo and Juliet.”

“Maybe. But I’d at least like to marry you at some point before we go drinking poison and stabbing ourselves. Deal?”

Yosuke laughed a little despite his blush, staring up as he was already tilting his head in to meet the sweetest kiss he’d ever received. His reply was whispered somewhere in that single moment that made up so many more moments of perfection that tied them together.

“Deal.”

_~ fin._


End file.
